Anger management has become very challenging in today’s world when you are constantly dealing with deadlines, managing multiple things and have expectations to be fulfilled of self and others.
As far as mistakes go, if they happen because of you, you can take onus, change yourself and work harder to achieve the things you were after. However, if there are other outside factors that interfere with your outcome, you tend to get angrier. The outside factors could be:
- You face obstacles in your path
- Things happen that are completely against your expectation
- Events happen that are beyond your control – it could be human error, or changes at a higher level in the wider world, like political events, economic upheavals, natural disasters and so on.
While you sit brooding, the following thoughts run through your mind:
- Why do I have to face delays?
- In spite of working hard, I don’t get my dues
- I have negative forces working against me
- I should get my birth chart analysed for a solution
- Why can’t I get things easily?
- Probably I am unlucky
- I have to deal with $%#@& people
In this state, you can fret and fume or vent your anger on those you feel responsible. But that tends to demotivate or antagonise or create fear in them, which means you cannot expect anything constructive from them except make them probably hasten things.
Sharing your anger among your friends, family and colleagues will also not help. Anger is a disempowering emotion – it makes you stuck and in this state, you can’t find a solution. So does that mean that when things don’t go our way, we should sit with folded hands?
No. The solution is given in the steps below:
- Accept what has happened or is happening
- Develop compassion and trust that there is nobody scheming against you, or resisting your will
- Know that there’s a solution. Just as there is a lock for every key, in the same way, no problem comes without a solution. The key lies in using your intelligence and power to command/convince /change the person/situation/factors that you are facing into your favour. The key could also involve surrender to what is happening and changing your path
Using strong words and using the power to command and change a person/situation is not anger. Nothing is anger until it burns you from inside. A positive force that can bring about changes in your world is the power you have been bestowed with – leashed and bridled anger. Unbridled anger will not only harm you emotionally and physically but also mark a dent in your relationships. Moreover, unbridled anger leads to hasty and reckless decisions, which you might regret later.
The main problem with anger is that it clouds your intelligence. Do you think, spiritually you are after completing things or achieving goals? Nothing ever finishes in this world, isn’t it? Goals follow goals, just as tomorrow follows tomorrow? What we are after is Self-realisation. We are after the supreme realisation of the ultimate truth that we are a trusting, peaceful, compassionate and knowing consciousness.